About Me

I'm a writer in Los Angeles, with more than my share of the struggle to get free. I've written screenplays, two children's books,articles for the New York Times and published a novel, Restraint, an erotic thriller. I have a master's degree from Harvard Divinity School. This blog is a ongoing record of what I've learned, what I'm learning and what I'm still realizing I need to know, as I work my way toward change.

Tuesday, May 3, 2016

POSSIBILITIES

There are countless possibilities locked away inside me. Some are unknown to me, some when I sense them fill me with fear, some I try to nourish and bring out into the world. It's one of the great dilemmas in being alive - anything is possible but I can only live out a few of my possibilities. Circumstances, choices, crazy ideas - they narrow my possibilities which I don't always realize. I'm locked in my ego and I misread the signs, don't catch half of what's going by, misjudge the importance of events. It can't be helped; it's part of the human condition.
     And there is the second guessing, the anxious ambivalence that I may be pursuing the wrong things. But haven't I learned by now that as I go along, there are no "wrong" choices; I simply do what I do, it leads to new possibilities which in turn further lead me on. A life, my life, is always evolving, constantly connecting myself to self.  
     No matter what I say about this, it comes down to one fact: my time is limited and I can't do all I have in me to do. But I don't have to think that's a lack of fulfilling my potential. Again, I can't do it all. But I can close my eyes and feel those possibilities inside me, the old ones and the new, feel them as a rich fullness. Isn't that what my spiritual life is all about? Feeling the expansiveness of all that lives inside me.

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