FLEXIBLE AND STRONG

"Plasticity then, in the widest sense of the word, means the possession of a structure weak enough to yield to an influence, but strong enough not to yield all at once.  Each relatively stable phase of equilibrium in such a structure is marked by what we may call a new set of habits."  -- William James

Substitute flexible, malleable for weak...plasticity, able to be shaped, molded, able to change. Not all at once, dramatically, but step by step, gradually so that equilibrium can be maintained. When it is you find yourself in a new place, acting in a new way.
     A slow transformation...I picture an old fashioned scales with suspended plates (or whatever they're  called) on either side. Add a weight and then another to one and slowly the plate that was high becomes low. There's a tipping point, a moment and it's elusive, impossible to discern. 
     The only physical exercise I genuinely like is walking uphill. I used to walk up one of canyon trails that begin where the pavement ends in Griffith Park.  This particular trail was steep for the first ten minutes or so.  When I first began walking up, I'd stop after those ten minutes, out of breath, my muscles sore.  
     One day, I found myself feeling bad because I stopped. It seemed like a wimpy thing to do. Nonetheless, I continued stopping but day by day the bad feeling deepened, the sense that I was letting myself down. You know what comes next - a day came when as I took my first steps I said to myself -- no stopping.  If it kills you, you're going straight to the top. Reader, I did.
     I think about that walking very often because I see in it the slow transformation of self.  For a while, I choose to stay put rather than take the risk of changing. But slowly wheels turn inside, the scales tip, the line is crossed. I realize I can't stand the pain of staying put and I take the risk of change.
     I no longer wish I could will myself across that line. I no longer believe that if only I could find the right words, ask the right questions, have enough information, change would come in a minute. 
     Flexible and strong, change coming in small increments, slow but from a very deep place. I'll take it.  Gladly.